Thursday, June 18, 2009

How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?


Charismatic:
Only 1
Hands already in the air.

Pentecostal:
10
One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians:
None
Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic:
None
Candles only.

Baptists:
At least 15.
One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalians:
3
One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

Mormons:
5
One man to change the bulb,and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians:
We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists:
Undetermined
Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.

Nazarene:
6
One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

Lutherans:
None
Lutherans don't believe in change.

Amish:
What's a light bulb?

- Author unknown

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