To Santa or not to Santa

I believe in Christian Liberty.  I think that believers have amazing lattitude in determining how they interact with the world.  And yet, with that freedom comes deep responsibility.

When my first child was born, I was a young Christian.  I was very immature in my faith and held to a largely fundamentalist view of social interaction. I understood my faith through things like making sure that there were rules to ban the external actions perceived to be sin.  I thought things like...Christians shouldn't drink or smoke or dance.

As my second child was born, I found myself thinking more about Santa Claus, deepening my understanding of Christian liberty, and reassessing my views on the jolly 'ol elf.

Unfortunately, in either corner of those Christian spheres, there is often little real thought given to the whole Santa Claus situation. 

I know that most people, most believers in America, see nothing wrong with Santa.  I have come to disagree.  Its complicated though.  I don't mean to say that one must share my views to be an orthodox Christian.  This is a matter of liberty since there is no verse in Scripture that says "Thou shalt not play along with the Santa routine."

(I just heard someone say that it may violate the 9th Commandmant.  Powerful thought.)

Its also complicated because I let my oldest believe in Santa and that morphed into my other kids doing the same.  I know that sounds hypocritical, but its just the strange circumstance I find myself in.  I am the minority viewpoint in my family and its not a battle worth fighting to the death over.

I do think that a child can believe in Santa and still grow up to be a believer.  The Holy Spirit (by definition), work miracles and saves people from all sorts of sin and falsehood.

Nevertheless, here is why I think we should stay away from Santa given the choice...

1)  He sets kids up for the destruction of faith.

Kids trust us.  We tell them about Santa as if he is a real magical being.  We create elaborate stories about his origins, his life, his deeds, and how he personally knows them.  He sees them when their sleeping, he knows when they are awake...

Then, once they get old enough to start thinking rationally and questioning the numerous Santas at every mall and department store around, we tell them it was all a big fib.  Of course, we try and paint it as a white lie that we told to benefit them.  We explain that we wanted them to feel wonder during the holiday season.

Their faith in Santa is crushed.  How can we think that they will have an easy time holding on to faith in Christ?

2)  He teaches moralism.

Santa doesn't teach grace.  he teaches kids that goodness is rewarded and bad works are punished.

That's the exact opposite of our great Gospel and only reinforces the teaching of this world and all other religions...moralism.

3) He detracts from the Incarnation.

Time spent obsessing over Santa is time lost celebrating the wonder of God made man.  That's super simple.

...................................................................................................

As a parting thought, check out this excerpt from John MacArthur:

Now, listen, if you look at the letters of Santa, you'll see that Satan is hidden in Santa. When we teach a child to sing "Santa Claus is Coming to Town", we're teaching him a false theology. We're teaching him a false set of doctrine. 

Let me see if I can explain it to you. First, that song teaches that Santa is a transcendent being. 
He lives on a higher plane; 
he lives on another level; 
he transcends time and space. 
He has powers equal to whom? God. 
Not only that, he knows everything. He is omniscient. 
He knows when you're sleeping. 
He knows when you're awake. 
He knows when you're naughty. 
He knows when you're nice. 
He knows everything. 
Not only that, he's everywhere. 
He sees you when you're sleeping. 
He's not only omniscient, he's omnipresent. 
And he's watching to see whether you've been good or bad. 

Not only that but he bestows favors. Now on what basis does Santa give his favors? What must I do to receive good things from this transcendent being called Santa? Well, it's very simple. I have to be what? 

Good. 

I can earn Santa's favor. If I'm good, Santa will give me gifts. After all, he's making a list. And he's checking it twice to make sure that we've been either naughty or nice and on the basis of how we've been, he'll deal with us. And if I'm not nice and good, I won't get any gifts. So I better be good for goodness sake. Not to mention for my own sake or anybody else's sake.

But you want to know something about Santa? He may be transcendent and he may be omniscient and he may be omnipotent, and he may be omnipresent, he may be dispensing all the good things, but you know what? 

You can't trust him. 

You can't trust him. So what do you mean by that? It says he's checking to see if you're naughty or nice and you better be good for goodness sake because if you're not good, you won't what? You won't get anything. You want to know something? That's not true. Plenty of times I haven't been good and I get something anyway.

Every year I get something. And you want to know the truth of it? There are a lot of naughty people get a lot and there are a lot of nice people don't get anything. You know what about Santa Claus? You can't trust him. He doesn't even stay true to his own word. He's blustering around and warning everybody to mind your manners and be good all the time. Be nice and not naughty and good and not bad. And then, you know what? When Christmas comes he caves in. And even when we've been naughty he gives us all that stuff. And sometimes he overlooks people that are nice. 

He really can't be trusted. His threats are meaningless and so are his promises. But that's good because it takes the sting out of them. And there's another good thing about Santa, you only have to worry about him once a year. He only shows up once. And you know when it is. It's always on December 25th, so you can get your act together just a few days before.

You say, well, where is he the rest of the time? Oh, he's in the North Pole.  What's he doing? Oh, he has all these elves around him. What are they doing? Whatever he tells them, mostly meaningless things like make toys.  He's sort of inane, isn't he? He threatens but never fulfills his threats. He promises but doesn't always fulfill his promises. 

Is it any wonder that if I believe all that as a child, when I come to be an adult, I might have a hard time believing in a transcendent God who does know everything? Who is everywhere? Who does have all power? Who does keep His promises and His threats? And who does not save me and give me good gifts on the basis of my works but on the basis of His Grace? 

If Santa has been my understanding of God, I'm in trouble. That's why I say hidden in the letters of Santa is Satan.
 
Good food for thought even if you disagree.

The Men and the Two Stones

As a person with very poor self-discipline, I need these type of messages.

A Heck of a Discussion

The Elephant Room 2 is coming and here is the description of one of their scheduled conversations...I am pretty excited to see how Jakes will respond to Driscoll.  I wish I could attend the event or one of the broadcasts.  Guess I'll wait for the reviews :(

TICKET TO RIDE

What are the ‘majors’ of Christian doctrine that cannot be diluted or denied for a person to be a Christian?
How can we help one another move beyond the bare minimum of accepted belief, to a pursuit of robust, soul-satisfying, biblical substance?
How should we relate to those who do not yet embrace the benefit and priority of sound biblical doctrine?
Is there a difference between a person in error and a wolf in sheep’s clothing?
What benefits derive from keeping the majors on a separate list and not letting the ‘minors’ divide us?
Is it possible to love the truth without compromise and still work passionately for unity?

Discussion by:
MARK DRISCOLL & T.D. JAKES

Moderated by:
James MacDonald

Christmas Music

In a world that is increasing embracing the idea of religious inclusivity and which is shunning the traditional claims of objective truth inherent in the gospel, I am glad for Christmas music.

Even on secular radio stations like Atlanta's 98.5, there is a willingness to play Christmas music for the last two months of the year.  And I am not referring to the shoddy moralism of "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" or the cheesiness of "Jingle Bell Rock," I mean real Christmas music...music about Christ.

In the past few days I have heard a number of the old, beautifully worded, and theological correct Christmas songs on 98.5.  That would include...

O' Holy Night.

Read these lyrics...this is what is so great for people to hear on a secular station.

O Holy Night! The stars are brightly shining,
It is the night of the dear Saviour's birth.
Long lay the world in sin and error pining.
Till He appeared and the Spirit felt its worth.
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.
Fall on your knees! Oh, hear the angel voices!
O night divine, the night when Christ was born;
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!

Led by the light of faith serenely beaming,
With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand.
O'er the world a star is sweetly gleaming,
Now come the wisemen from out of the Orient land.
The King of kings lay thus lowly manger;
In all our trials born to be our friends.
He knows our need, our weakness is no stranger,
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!

Truly He taught us to love one another,
His law is love and His gospel is peace.
Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother.
And in his name all oppression shall cease.
Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,
With all our hearts we praise His holy name.
Christ is the Lord! Then ever, ever praise we,
His power and glory ever more proclaim!
His power and glory ever more proclaim!

I am not naive enough to think that hearing these lyrics is some magic formula for folks being saved, but it can be part of the "seed-planting and watering" that we have a hand in.  I am excited because hearing about Jesus is always better than not hearing about Jesus and God can do amazing things as he makes those seeds grow!

Make Us Dangerous!

We are so utterly ordinary, so commonplace, while we profess to know a Power the twentieth century does not reckon with. But we are “harmless,” and therefore unharmed. We are spiritual pacifists, non-militants, conscientious objectors in this battle-to-the-death with principalities and powers in high places. Meekness must be had for contact with men, but brass, outspoken boldness is required to take part in the comradeship of the Cross. We are “sideliners” — coaching and criticizing the real wrestlers while content to sit by and leave the enemies of God unchallenged. The world cannot hate us, we are too much like its own. Oh that God would make us dangerous!


Jim Elliot

Does it Make God a Moral Monster if He Ordains All that Comes to Pass?

Been crazy busy as of late with the three young'uns.  As such, I have been giving little of my own thoughts and much reposting.  Don't expect this to be any different.  In fact, you should be happy to come to my blog and read stuff better organized and more thoughtful than my own brain allows...lol.

A short response to Roger Olson by John Hendryx

One of the major premises of Roger Olson's new book "Against Calvinism" is his declaration that classic Reformed doctrine of meticulous providence makes God into a moral monster, or worse, indistinguishable from the devil. He asserts that the Calvinist cannot consistently affirm that God ordains all that comes to pass, including the wicked acts of men, without also making God the author of sin.

Does it follow? Not in the least. The charge that it makes God a moral monster if the God of Scripture ordains all things, even the wicked acts of men, rests ultimately on the assumption that unless we can explain his actions then we may sit in judgment upon Him. In other words, the charge rests purely upon rationalism and extra-biblical logic. We acknowledge that we cannot explain all of God's secret acts since God has chosen not to reveal many things about Himself. But one very prominent feature of the Bible is that it frequently declares that God meticulously ordains all that comes to pass (Eph 1:11) AND that men are responsible for their actions. One major example sticks out: the greatest sin ever committed by men in history -- the crucifixion of Jesus ---when the Apostle Peter, preaching at Pentecost declares:

"...this Jesus, delivered up according to the definite plan and foreknowledge of God, you crucified and killed by the hands of lawless men." (Acts 2:23)

and two chapters later in Acts it again says:

"...both Herod, and Pontius Pilate, with the Gentiles, and the people of Israel, were gathered together, For to do whatsoever thy hand and thy counsel determined before to be done." (Acts 4:27-28)

Isaiah 53 also says

"...it was the will of the LORD to crush [bruise] him"

The Bible itself testifies, in plain language, that God ordained evil men to crucify Jesus. Yet "lawless men" are 100% responsible for carrying it out. So those who embrace the Bible as authoritative need to be able to develop a theology which fits that into their view. While you may not understand it, you must yield to what the Scripture teaches regarding God's meticulous hand of providence in all things, and His blamelessness in doing them. And just as the crucifixion of Jesus was was not done without purpose, but for a greater good, so God tell us that all things (including evil events) work for good of those who love God (Rom 8:28-30). So these things are not thoughtlessly ordained without any purpose. It would perhaps only make God a moral monster if He allowed the evil, but that its existence was ultimately meaningless or done for the sake of cruelty itself. But we know God, in His perfect wisdom, sees beyond this fleeting world to the ultimate conclusion to these matters.

There are countless examples like this in the Bible. For instance, when disaster struck Job and his family at the behest of Satan, Job did not look to second causes but acknowledged that "the Lord gives and the Lord takes away." And the text says that "in all this Job did not sin or charge God with wrong." ( Job 1:22).

The fatal flaw in Olson's argument flows mostly from his insistence that Calvinists must somehow explain this philosophically or else we are being inconsistent, or worse, make God into a monster. But I would argue to the contrary: since the Bible holds forth our highest presuppositions, the most consistent position possible is to yield to the Bible's teaching that both God's sovereignty and human responsibility are true. God does not tell us much about HOW he can ordain evil acts while not being guilty of evil, only shows many examples where He does so for a greater purpose, often to remind people of the human condition and need for God. Ultimately it may be a mystery for human beings to understand at the time, yet crystal clear as regards to its established truth in the Bible.

Likewise, nowhere in the Bible did God call us to work out the details of this doctrine by philosophical means, or pry into the secret things of God. Rather He calls us to be faithful to the Text that says God ordains all things, even evil, and that, at the same time, God is blameless in doing so. That He ordains sin sinlessly. I do not have to hold these truths together rationally (according to human knowledge) or philosophically but because they are axiomatic in the Bible. My understanding the intricacies of how this comes about is secondary. God is God. DO our finite minds have to understand HOW He does this in order for it to be true?

It appears that, ultimately, Olson's objections to this are moral and philosophical rather than exegetical. He is, therefore, basing his considerations and thus his theological foundations on sand. The conclusions we reach, I would contend, must be based on what the Scripture says. For the alternative is to draw our highest presuppositions from something other than an authoritative source, such as unaided human reason. It is of utmost importance that he come up with exegetical grounds for his position, rather than base his theology on an emotional reaction.

I honestly cringe for Olson when he says that if God ordains evil events then God is indistinguishable from the devil, because the Bible declares that God does ordain all events, and also declares that he does so blamelessly, i.e. without sin. And if our theology is biblical, (and I believe it is) then Dr. Olson ends up calling God a monster or worse, the devil.

Note: It should be a given for Christians, that due to the fall, all human beings are not safe from temporal and eternal punishment. Why should it, therefore, so surprise Olson that God justly exercises this authority during our lives? Judgement has already begun east of Eden and we all are subject to death. So nothing (no suffering) should surprise us here except for the great mercy He has shown us in Jesus Christ. Regarding the Tower of Siloam (Luke 13:4), Jesus declared that it did not fall on people for their particular sin(s) because they were somehow worse that others, but as a sign in this fallen world that we are all ill-deserving sinners, under a curse who need to repent and receive the mercy of Jesus Christ. Don't be surprised that the tower fell on those people - let it be a sober reminder that you deserve the same.

Do People Who Commit Suicide Go to Heaven?

What do you say if someone genuinely asks you, "Do people who commit suicide go to heaven?" Whatever you do don't answer with this: “Suicide is not the unpardonable sin. If we think that suicide is immune to the cleansing blood of Christ we have misunderstood the extent of redemption.” This might be theologically correct; it is pastorally abysmal.

We are allowed minor variations on these, but there are only two correct responses to this question: “Why do you ask?” and “It sounds like things are really hard for you. Please tell me what’s happening.”

Here is the principle: theological questions are often personal questions in disguise; they are about the burdens on a person’s heart. Please do not respond with theological propositions or ethical guidelines. Instead, use these questions as the time to know and shepherd the person.

Hmm. This sounds like prudent advice, but it also sounds a bit suspect. It sounds like an artificial and potentially dangerous distinction between theology and ministry. Shepherding is profoundly theological; I am not trying to make a distinction between the two. My concern is the theological choices. Do you choose to respond with a proposition about the unpardonable sin or the morality of suicide? Or does your theology, which in this case compels you to humility and compassion, lead you to ask at least one more question?

As shepherds we have to assimilate classroom theology into our lives so it is no longer a series of propositions. Then we will be ready to offer it in way that fits the person in front of us. These two pastoral responses: “Why do you ask?” and “It sounds like things are really hard for you...” reflect applied and personal theology. They will quickly take us to places that go beyond the ethics of suicide.

They might take us to this place: “My friend’s brother just committed suicide. And I have no idea what to say to her.” In this situation pastoral theology might lead us to say, “You obviously love this friend. Tell me a little more about what she is saying and what you think might encourage her.”

As you talk together you might remember that most people who are close to suicide feel guilty. Family and friends feel like they should have known, that they should have done or said something to prevent it. So, you could raise this issue and together consider ways to invite her friend to speak openly about it. If her friend feels guilty you might help her reframe the guilt as, “You know that we are human and don’t know all things. Maybe you are saying that you wish so much that you could have done something but couldn’t. You feel helpless more than guilty. And you feel such grief that your brother was suffering so much.” You would offer these things tentatively and with the invitation to be corrected.

Too often “theology” means “answers” and most people aren’t looking for answers. Instead, theology guides us in how to love wisely, and everyone is looking for that.

From the Resurgence

Fools Gold

Most popular Christian music is lame...this is not.

God Loves You

"He lived the life you failed to live and He died the death you should have died."





...but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
- Romans 5:8


For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures, and that he appeared to Cephas, then to the twelve. Then he appeared to more than five hundred brothers at one time, most of whom are still alive, though some have fallen asleep. ⁷Then he appeared to James, then to all the apostles.  Last of all, as to one untimely born, he appeared also to me. 
- 1 Corinthians 5: 3-8

Pastor's"American Idol"

Check out this article for 16 things that Mark Driscoll will be looking for in his "preaching contestants" on November 15th.

Here are 3 to get you interested...

1)  Tell me about Jesus

2)  Invite lost people to salvation

3)  Avoid Christian jargon and explain your terms

Make WAR!

Fairy Tales

"It was in fairy-stories that I first divined the potency of the words, and the wonder of things, such as stone, and wood, and iron; tree and grass; house and fire; bread and wine. 

Far more powerful and poignant is the effect of joy in a serious tale of Faerie. In such stories, when the sudden turn comes, we get a piercing glimpse of joy, and heart's desire, that for a moment passes outside the frame, rends indeed the very web of story, and lets a gleam come through. 

I would venture to say that approaching the Christian story from this perspective, it has long been my feeling that God redeemed the corrupt making-creatures, men, in a way fitting to this aspect, as to others, of their strange nature. 

The Gospels contain a fairy-story, or a story of a larger kind which embraces all the essence of fairy-stories. ...and among its marvels is the greatest and most complete conceivable eucatastrophe. The Birth of Christ is the eucatastrophe of Man's history. The Resurrection is the eucatastrophe of the story of the Incarnation." 

- JRR Tolkien

What I'm reading - November 2011

On the back of the toliet...

The Elephant Room

The Elephant Room features blunt conversations between seven influential pastors who take differing approaches to ministry. No keynotes. No canned messages. These are “the conversations you never thought you’d hear.” All conversations are moderated by James MacDonald of Harvest Bible Chapel and Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Church.


In case you missed the inaugural Elephant Room, check this trailer out:



The Elephant Room from Harvest Bible Chapel on Vimeo.


And this coming year, the Elephant Room 2 should be pretty awesome as TD Jakes gets confronted, face to face, on his beliefs regarding the Trinity.



The Elephant Room: Round 2 from Harvest Bible Chapel on Vimeo.


There has been alot of controversy about The Elephant Room...from "its too macho" to "how can they even invite TD Jakes?"  Maybe some of the controversy is legit.  Regardless, I find the format and the potential for direct, honest communication absolutely fascinating!


Praying that God will get the glory on 1-25-2012.

The Perfection of Beauty

That is the trailer for Shai Linne's new album "The Attributes of God."

If you are not familiar with the recent explosion of "Holy Hip-Hop/ Reformed Rappers," you should be.  With beats and tracks as good as any secular artist, these young men are providing gospel-centered, theologically correct, and culturally relevant lyrics for a generation in need of the truth.

You can check out the flagship label Reach Records and a primer article for more info.

...and if you haven't seen this masterpiece of the spoken word yet, check it out...
http://jasonallenglover.blogspot.com/2011/08/truth-in-art.html

James 1

A few days ago, a friend asked me to read James 1 and give him my general thoughts on the passage.  Here goes:

Verses 2-4

In these verses, James seems to be telling us that going through hardships that test our faith is good for us.  In fact, it seems to say that the testing of our faith really serves to bolster our faith.  One thing that strikes me here is that James indicates we should rejoice in the hardships.  He doesn't say endure or push through, he says to "count it all joy."  Thats powerful because being full of joy in the midst of trials is exactly what the hope of the Gospel allows us to do.  Its also the type of behavior that causes the world is ask "how can that person be so happy going through that difficulty?"  Thats the kind of question that opens the door to evangelism!

Verses 5-8

Still on the subject of going through trials and tests of faith, James informs us that we can always ask for wisdom to guide us through the trouble.  But he reminds us that we must have faith that our God WILL see us through.  A person who doubts that God is with them, and who asks for wisdom nonetheless, is confused and unable to receive God's gift of wisdom because of their unbelief.

Verses 9-11

Be humble as you are tested.  Remember that it is God who sustains and delivers us.  We ourselves are but specks in the grand scheme of time.  We are nothing, by inference...He is everything.

Verses 12-15

Remain steadfast!  Do not think that God is tempting you if you are tempted.  God will test, but he can never tempt because of his perfectly holy nature.  Interestingly...James makes it clear that the temptation comes from inside our own depraved souls.  He does not blame the temptation on the devil or on demons, although he clearly believes in the truth and power of dark forces.  In this passage he notes that we lead ourselves to eternal death by our sin nature.

Verses 16-18

A good passage to confirm the immutable (unchanging) nature of God and to reaffirm that the will of the Father, through the work of the Son, is the only way that we have become adopted sons and daughters.

Verses 19-21

Almost as if to say, now here is how you remain steadfast, James shifts to some practical advice for his audience.  The wonderful, and seldom followed admonition to listen and be slow to speech/ anger is one of the best "application points" in the Scriptures.  In saying "put away the filth," I sense that James is talking about repentance.  He is telling us to die to our old self and to receive the "implanted word"...which I take to mean Christ.  Essentially he is echoing John 3 here..."be born again."

Verses 22-25

We must do more than mentally assent to the truth of the Gospel.  A real conversion will manifest itself in supreme love for Christ, a love that forces us to begin putting our faith into action.  If a person says they are saved but you fail to see them "doing" any work to bear fruit, the validity of that salvation may be something that only exists in the individuals mind.

Verses 26-27

The comment here about being "religious" with an unbridled tongue is a continuation of 22-25.  I think its important to note that James could have chosen to mention any number of specific examples here.  He picked the sin that is caused by hurtful words.  The use of harsh words is something that is all too easy for humans, believer and non-believer alike, to regularly fail at.  Its one of the things we must be most vigilant against!

To finish this chapter, James gives another example of how we must put our belief in the Gospel into action.  He mentions the most helpless people of any society...orphan kids and old women without family.  He reminds us to do more than talk the talk, he notes that we are expected to also walk the walk.  This last verse is the one that I recently heard in the context of "the biblical imperative to look after orphans isn't an option."  Its also the verse that solidified our family's decision to adopt soon!

Hope that helps!

Happy Reformation Day

Celebrate with your own Luther, Spurgeon, or Edwards mask courtesy of The Resurgence.

Luther certainly did not intend his Ninety-Five Theses to be a call to reformation, for he did not want to cause a rift in the church. He merely wanted to be faithful to Scripture. In fact, the public discussion prompted by the posting of theses was merely the typical way in which debate took place in that time. Yet, the content of the theses that Luther posted were rather controversial. And because of the newfound technologies of the printing press and the cultural situation of the early 1500s, Luther’s ideas were carried throughout Germany and gave way to the German stream of the Reformation.

The Ninety-Five Theses were fueled by a controversy in the church regarding the sale of indulgences. An indulgence was a statement made by the church that removed or satisfied the punishment for sin. Indulgences relied on the “treasury of merits.” According to this idea, many of the saints of the church died with more merit than they needed to enter into heaven. So, the excess merit was “stored,” and the Pope was the dispenser of these merits.”

People in the Medieval period were very concerned with the period of punishment in purgatory—a post-mortem punishment stressed in great detail by the church. They were not so much afraid of hell because they believed the forgiveness and blessing from their priest would guarantee them entrance into heaven. However, the pains of purgatory remained a reality they were scared to face. The church taught that before they would be able to enter heaven, they had to be cleaned of every sin they had committed in their lives on earth. Indulgences worked, then, to cleanse them from sin. The church made penance a sacrament, solidifying in the minds of the people that an indulgence would shorten their period of punishment to be endured in purgatory.

Luther’s main opponent in the indulgence controversy targeted in the Ninety-Five Theses was Johann Tetzel, an indulgence salesman hired by Albrecht, the Archbishop of Mainz. Albrecht agreed to sponsor the rebuilding of St. Pierre’s Cathedral in Rome, and the Pope agreed to grant a special indulgence that he could sell in order to raise the necessary funds.

Many Protestants are most familiar with Luther’s emphasis on justification by faith; however, his Ninety-Five Theses were about indulgences, papal authority, the authority of Scripture, and forgiveness of sin. Luther’s Ninety-Five Theses were primarily intended to facilitate discussion concerning the theology of indulgences. After several centuries of abuse of pastoral responsibility in the church, the practice of selling indulgences had grown into a scandal.

Luther saw a major pastoral problem in the selling of indulgences. It encouraged people in their sin and turned their minds away from Christ and God’s forgiveness and to buying forgiveness. Luther’s frustration with the church was with their claiming to have authority to control a person’s time in heaven or hell or purgatory. While Luther’s Ninety-Five Theses touched on an issue of every day practice and hit a nerve in the very depths of the structure of authority that existed in the Medieval church. The formal cause of the Protestant Reformation was the issue of justification and the material cause was ecclesiology, doctrine of the church.

The Ninety-Five Theses called the church to repentance and urged the leaders of the indulgence movement to direct their gaze to Christ, the only one who was able to pay the penalty due for sin: “Our Lord and Master Jesus Christ...willed that the whole life of believers should be repentance.” (Thesis 1). Instead of the treasury of merit that was for sale, Luther protested, “The true treasure of the Church is the Most Holy Gospel of the glory and the grace of God” (Thesis 62).

Of all the portions of the document, Luther’s closing (theses 92-95) is perhaps the most memorable:

92. Away, then, with those prophets who say to Christ's people, “Peace, peace,” where in there is no peace. 93. Hail, hail to all those prophets who say to Christ's people, “The cross, the cross,” where there is no cross. 94. Christians should be exhorted to be zealous to follow Christ, their Head, through penalties, deaths, and hells. 95. And let them thus be more confident of entering heaven through many tribulations rather than through a false assurance of peace.

Luther was ordered by the church to recant in 1520 and was eventually exiled and outlawed in 1521.

One of the greatest ways in which Luther’s Ninety-Five Theses affect us today—in addition to the wonderful inheritance of the five Reformation solas—is that they call us to thoroughly examine the inherited practices of the church against the standard set forth in the Scriptures. Luther saw an abuse, was not afraid to address it, and was exiled as a result of his faithfulness to the Bible in the midst of harsh opposition.

- also from The Resurgence

LifeGroup Recap

This past week, our new LifeGroup talked about...

"Lies and our worth in Christ"

1) Satan is the author of all falsehood.
Straight from the mouth of Jesus.
(John 8:42-44)

2) The enemy has been lying to us since the beginning.
His half-truth about the fruit of the tree gave Adam and Eve an excuse to sin.
(Genesis 3: 1-6)

3) Seeing their nakedness...a state figurative of their rebellion, sin, and shame...our first ancestors try and cover themselves up. Then they hide, tell their own half-truths, and finger-point to escape the truth.
Lies breed more untruth.
(Genesis 3: 7-13)

4) Yet, even in their disobedience, God recognizes their inability to cover their own nakedness and he gives them mercy.
A physical cover of loincloth.
(Genesis 3: 21)
A spiritual promise to defeat the evil one . - The protoevangelion or "first gospel message"
(Genesis 3: 15)

5) Today, the devil still lurks about...lying to us to seek our destruction.
Since he can't separate us from God, he will try and make us miserable here and now.
(1 Peter 5:8)

6) Sometimes we hear his lies and internalize them to ourselves or speak them to others.
The flesh and the world are our enemies as much as Satan.
(Colossians 3: 9-10)

7) Lies we hear often fall into two categories:
You are awesome, you deserve that.
You suck, you don't deserve that.

8) Lies we hear from Satan, from the world around us, and from our own flesh include:
"Successful equals lots of money, lots of friends, and a powerful position in life."
"You're too fat...too skinny...too ugly..."
"You are not a good...mother, father, person, son, daughter, friend..."
"You can't come to Jesus because you are a sinner"
and so many more...

9) The truth is that anyone can come to meet Jesus.
He wants to save the broken people, not hang out with the cool crowd
(Matthew 9:13)

10) The truth is that believers find their identity IN Christ,.
We are not to be held down by the lies of the enemy and the world.
(Romans 8:1)

11) To combat these lies we must...
Come to know Jesus
(Romans 10:9)
Study the Scripture to the point it is our default offensive weapon against the lies surrounding us
(Ephesians 6:17)
Pray always
(1 Thessalonians 5:17)
Be in a community of believers who can provide positive encouragement
(Romans 1:12)

Marital Charity

"Philanthropy means investing money in a charity that does not pay you any dividends—you get no profit out of it. You give money and get no money back. So economically, you can’t be philanthropic—you can’t give away a lot of money—unless you have a good income from somewhere else. 

In the same way, I argue that you can’t do a good job of loving your spouse unconditionally unless you have a strong love relationship with God through Christ. Loving your spouse unconditionally means that, for a season that may be short or long, you love your spouse when you aren’t getting much or any love in response. Your spouse may be deeply discouraged or have become ill or troubled in some way. At a time like that you must serve and love your spouse without expecting much affection, service, or love in return. That is love "philanthropy." In any long-term marriage there will be times that require this. You will be giving a lot more love than you are getting. But if your spouse is the main or only source of love in your life, it will hurt too much to love without getting any love back. You won’t be able to do it. You will just blow up and attack your spouse or look elsewhere for love. God and his love must be a spiritual reality in your life if you are going to be able to love your spouse steadily over the long haul."

Tim Keller

Osteen and Mormonism

"Our culture admires those with low theological commitment and high emphasis on attitude. In Joel Osteen’s case, it is the secular culture that has influenced the minister, and not the minister that is influencing he culture."

Read the entire, disturbing article HERE.

Halloween and the Gospel

What if thinking evangelistically about Halloween didn’t mean just dropping tracts into children’s bags, but the good candy—and seeing the evening as an opportunity to cultivate relationships with the unbelieving as part of an ongoing process in which we plainly identify with Jesus, get to know them well, and personally speak the good news of our Savior into their lives?

http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/sent-into-the-harvest-halloween-on-mission?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+DGBlog+%28DG+Blog%29

Not just a ticket...

Being able to articulate the gospel with accuracy is one thing; having its truth captivate your soul is quite another.

The gospel is not just supposed to be our ticket into heaven; it is to be an entirely new basis for how we relate to God, ourselves, and others. It is to be the source from which everything else flows.

— J. D. Greear

This mornings verse.

But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved
Eph2.4.ESV

What I Believe...

I think that I can best express my beliefs by sticking to the Confessional Statement of The Gospel Coalition.  This allows me to remain solidly "closed-handed" on issues of first importance while allowing for freedom in disagreement over secondary/ tertiary issues.

1. The Tri-une God We believe in one God, eternally existing in three equally divine Persons: the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, who know, love, and glorify one another. This one true and living God is infinitely perfect both in his love and in his holiness. He is the Creator of all things, visible and invisible, and is therefore worthy to receive all glory and adoration. Immortal and eternal, he perfectly and exhaustively knows the end from the beginning, sustains and sovereignly rules over all things, and providentially brings about his eternal good purposes to redeem a people for himself and restore his fallen creation, to the praise of his glorious grace.

1. Revelation God has graciously disclosed his existence and power in the created order, and has supremely revealed himself to fallen human beings in the person of his Son, the incarnate Word. Moreover, this God is a speaking God who by his Spirit has graciously disclosed himself in human words: we believe that God has inspired the words preserved in the Scriptures, the sixty-six books of the Old and New Testaments, which are both record and means of his saving work in the world. These writings alone constitute the verbally inspired Word of God, which is utterly authoritative and without error in the original writings, complete in its revelation of his will for salvation, sufficient for all that God requires us to believe and do, and final in its authority over every domain of knowledge to which it speaks. We confess that both our finitude and our sinfulness preclude the possibility of knowing God’s truth exhaustively, but we affirm that, enlightened by the Spirit of God, we can know God’s revealed truth truly. The Bible is to be believed, as God’s instruction, in all that it teaches; obeyed, as God’s command, in all that it requires; and trusted, as God’s pledge, in all that it promises. As God’s people hear, believe, and do the Word, they are equipped as disciples of Christ and witnesses to the gospel.

1. Creation of Humanity We believe that God created human beings, male and female, in his own image. Adam and Eve belonged to the created order that God himself declared to be very good, serving as God’s agents to care for, manage, and govern creation, living in holy and devoted fellowship with their Maker. Men and women, equally made in the image of God, enjoy equal access to God by faith in Christ Jesus and are both called to move beyond passive self-indulgence to significant private and public engagement in family, church, and civic life. Adam and Eve were made to complement each other in a one-flesh union that establishes the only normative pattern of sexual relations for men and women, such that marriage ultimately serves as a type of the union between Christ and his church. In God’s wise purposes, men and women are not simply interchangeable, but rather they complement each other in mutually enriching ways. God ordains that they assume distinctive roles which reflect the loving relationship between Christ and the church, the husband exercising headship in a way that displays the caring, sacrificial love of Christ, and the wife submitting to her husband in a way that models the love of the church for her Lord. In the ministry of the church, both men and women are encouraged to serve Christ and to be developed to their full potential in the manifold ministries of the people of God. The distinctive leadership role within the church given to qualified men is grounded in creation, fall, and redemption and must not be sidelined by appeals to cultural developments.

1. The Fall We believe that Adam, made in the image of God, distorted that image and forfeited his original blessedness—for himself and all his progeny—by falling into sin through Satan’s temptation. As a result, all human beings are alienated from God, corrupted in every aspect of their being (e.g., physically, mentally, volitionally, emotionally, spiritually) and condemned finally and irrevocably to death—apart from God’s own gracious intervention. The supreme need of all human beings is to be reconciled to the God under whose just and holy wrath we stand; the only hope of all human beings is the undeserved love of this same God, who alone can rescue us and restore us to himself.

1. The Plan of God We believe that from all eternity God determined in grace to save a great multitude of guilty sinners from every tribe and language and people and nation, and to this end foreknew them and chose them. We believe that God justifies and sanctifies those who by grace have faith in Jesus, and that he will one day glorify them—all to the praise of his glorious grace. In love God commands and implores all people to repent and believe, having set his saving love on those he has chosen and having ordained Christ to be their Redeemer.

1. The Gospel We believe that the gospel is the good news of Jesus Christ—God’s very wisdom. Utter folly to the world, even though it is the power of God to those who are being saved, this good news is christological, centering on the cross and resurrection: the gospel is not proclaimed if Christ is not proclaimed, and the authentic Christ has not been proclaimed if his death and resurrection are not central (the message is: "Christ died for our sins . . . [and] was raised”). This good news is biblical (his death and resurrection are according to the Scriptures), theological and salvific (Christ died for our sins, to reconcile us to God), historical (if the saving events did not happen, our faith is worthless, we are still in our sins, and we are to be pitied more than all others), apostolic (the message was entrusted to and transmitted by the apostles, who were witnesses of these saving events), and intensely personal (where it is received, believed, and held firmly, individual persons are saved).

1. The Redemption of Christ We believe that, moved by love and in obedience to his Father, the eternal Son became human: the Word became flesh, fully God and fully human being, one Person in two natures. The man Jesus, the promised Messiah of Israel, was conceived through the miraculous agency of the Holy Spirit, and was born of the virgin Mary. He perfectly obeyed his heavenly Father, lived a sinless life, performed miraculous signs, was crucified under Pontius Pilate, arose bodily from the dead on the third day, and ascended into heaven. As the mediatorial King, he is seated at the right hand of God the Father, exercising in heaven and on earth all of God’s sovereignty, and is our High Priest and righteous Advocate. We believe that by his incarnation, life, death, resurrection, and ascension, Jesus Christ acted as our representative and substitute. He did this so that in him we might become the righteousness of God: on the cross he canceled sin, propitiated God, and, by bearing the full penalty of our sins, reconciled to God all those who believe. By his resurrection Christ Jesus was vindicated by his Father, broke the power of death and defeated Satan who once had power over it, and brought everlasting life to all his people; by his ascension he has been forever exalted as Lord and has prepared a place for us to be with him. We believe that salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name given under heaven by which we must be saved. Because God chose the lowly things of this world, the despised things, the things that are not, to nullify the things that are, no human being can ever boast before him—Christ Jesus has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness, and redemption.

1. The Justification of Sinners We believe that Christ, by his obedience and death, fully discharged the debt of all those who are justified. By his sacrifice, he bore in our stead the punishment due us for our sins, making a proper, real, and full satisfaction to God’s justice on our behalf. By his perfect obedience he satisfied the just demands of God on our behalf, since by faith alone that perfect obedience is credited to all who trust in Christ alone for their acceptance with God. Inasmuch as Christ was given by the Father for us, and his obedience and punishment were accepted in place of our own, freely and not for anything in us, this justification is solely of free grace, in order that both the exact justice and the rich grace of God might be glorified in the justification of sinners. We believe that a zeal for personal and public obedience flows from this free justification.

1. The Power of the Holy Spirit We believe that this salvation, attested in all Scripture and secured by Jesus Christ, is applied to his people by the Holy Spirit. Sent by the Father and the Son, the Holy Spirit glorifies the Lord Jesus Christ, and, as the other Paraclete, is present with and in believers. He convicts the world of sin, righteousness, and judgment, and by his powerful and mysterious work regenerates spiritually dead sinners, awakening them to repentance and faith, and in him they are baptized into union with the Lord Jesus, such that they are justified before God by grace alone through faith alone in Jesus Christ alone. By the Spirit's agency, believers are renewed, sanctified, and adopted into God's family; they participate in the divine nature and receive his sovereignly distributed gifts. The Holy Spirit is himself the down payment of the promised inheritance, and in this age indwells, guides, instructs, equips, revives, and empowers believers for Christ-like living and service.

1. The Kingdom of God We believe that those who have been saved by the grace of God through union with Christ by faith and through regeneration by the Holy Spirit enter the kingdom of God and delight in the blessings of the new covenant: the forgiveness of sins, the inward transformation that awakens a desire to glorify, trust, and obey God, and the prospect of the glory yet to be revealed. Good works constitute indispensable evidence of saving grace. Living as salt in a world that is decaying and light in a world that is dark, believers should neither withdraw into seclusion from the world, nor become indistinguishable from it: rather, we are to do good to the city, for all the glory and honor of the nations is to be offered up to the living God. Recognizing whose created order this is, and because we are citizens of God’s kingdom, we are to love our neighbors as ourselves, doing good to all, especially to those who belong to the household of God. The kingdom of God, already present but not fully realized, is the exercise of God’s sovereignty in the world toward the eventual redemption of all creation. The kingdom of God is an invasive power that plunders Satan’s dark kingdom and regenerates and renovates through repentance and faith the lives of individuals rescued from that kingdom. It therefore inevitably establishes a new community of human life together under God.

Marriage

‎"The key to a healthy marriage is simply to reenact the gospel to each other on a daily basis. 

You can talk about communication skills and that other stuff, and it's all good stuff, but basically the foundation is knowing how to forgive and knowing how to repent. 

If you both can forgive your spouse and repent for your own sin, it doesn't really matter how different you are, you'll be okay." 

Paraphrased from Tim Keller

Spurgeon Rap

Trail to Hell

http://vimeo.com/27773475

The video that you can view at the link above scares the crap out of me.  Not the way that the producers were intending however.

A local church is using the Halloween season to put on an extremely graphic, dramatic portrayal of humans committing major sins as a way to "scare" people into "making a decision" for Jesus.

Attendees (you must be at least 12 years old) will see reenactments of drug abuse, drunk driving, porn addiction, abortion, homosexuality, and suicide.  As a result of being shocked by these grisly and disturbing images, the church webpage claims that there is a 60% rate of salvation. 

Their web-page says that 5000 people have come down the Trail in the past and that 3000 of them have committed their life to Jesus.  That seems like a staggering statistic and I am deeply afraid that many of those, who were scared into a confession of faith, did not have true repentance and regeneration as much as a deep sense of dread that they would end up in flames - thus their choice to invoke a "get out of hell free card."

Being born again isn't about being scared for your own well-being.  Its about acknowledging the depths of your own sin, your inability to get right with God, and the plan of salvation that culminates in Christ's atonement for you.  I fear that making so much out of these "big" sins may cause people to fail in seeing how depraved they are in their everyday envy and lust.

I am also very afraid that conversion by guilt or fear, when true, is harmful because it sets a new believer into a heretical mindset of moralism instead of an abiding love and trust of Jesus and God's grace.

The church uses Jude 23 as their proof text:

...save others by snatching them out of the fire; to others show mercy with fear, hating even the garment stained by the flesh. (ESV)

Of course, the church (like so many) pulls the passage out of context and uses it to make a point they want to make, not the point that the author intended.  In context, that passage is dealing with how the elect should handle false teachers.  It is directing us to "show mercy with fear," not in terms of scaring non-believers with scenes of grusome sin and images of eternal flame.  Rather it is saying, we should show mercy to the the false teachers because their coming was fortold and they don't have the gift of Christ...all the while, our mercy should be sprinkled with a healthy dose of fear...fear that we may be taken in by their lies.  Fear that their falsehoods would be associated with us in some way as we are merciful to them. 

The verse is about us having fear as we deal lovingly with false teachers, even as we hate their worldly teaching.  Its not a verse about being merciful to unbelievers by using fear tactics to scare them into largely nominal faith in Christ.

I know that, even in the midst of such confused methods, God is still active and there are individuals being born again.  I praise God for that.  I just wonder if there is a better, more biblical way of using our time and energy to reach the lost than a theatrical portrayal of horrible sins, in an effort to try and scare people into Heaven?

Gun Collectors and Soldiers

We need to be careful that we are getting too obsessed with dotting the doctrinal "i's" and crossing the gospel "t's", while forgetting to share the simple story of redemption with real people that we encounter.

Are we becoming gun collectors and not soldiers?

Do we need to pull that gospel gun off the shelf and shoot ourselves?

(paraphrased from Mark Driscoll in the Elephant Room)

Race, Cross, and the Christian

Here is the full 20-minute documentary featuring John Piper’s story of race and grace, as recounted in his new book Bloodlines: Race, Cross, and the Christian. It’s an all-too-typical story of race, followed by an unusual display of God’s grace.


Bloodlines Documentary with John Piper from Crossway on Vimeo.

Biblical Manhood

Here is it, in preparation for the upcoming marriage book by Driscoll, his most popular sermon ever and one which is incredibly convicting to my own heart.  This sermon addresses the heart of 85% of our societal issues today...the lack of real men leading their families.  I encourage you to watch the video because Pastor Mark delivers the message as only he can.  If you need to go back and study some of what he said, I will provide some bullet points from the Mars Hill webpage for additional help.

http://marshill.com/media/trial/marriage-and-men

Now, my tone is for the men. We speak to men differently than women. Were this a women’s conference, I would not call you all idiots and imbeciles and fools, that you’re a joke, okay? But you men, this is where it needs to go. You’ve been glad-handed and buddied up and positive thinking and you’re a winner and Jesus loves you and you can do better. And I’m telling you, you’re a joke. And the real men in the room know it and they see it. And maybe there’s one woman that you fooled and she doesn’t see it because like Eve, she’s deceived.

First Peter 3:7, here’s what he has to say:

“Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayer may not be hindered.”

In the previous verse, 1 Peter 3:6, he said that women, when it comes to marriage are prone toward, what? Fear. Fear. And you know what? Those fears that the women have about marriage are legitimate, they are.

If a woman marries a man, she’s trusting him with the rest of her life that he won’t hit her, cheat on her, that he’ll work hard, that he’ll pay the bills, that he’ll love their children, that he’ll finish the race well, that he’ll walk with Jesus ‘til the end, that if she gets sick, he’ll look after her, that if she is dying, he will be faithful to her. Gentlemen, it is a terrifying thing for a woman to trust a sinful man.

As a man, I don’t think I fully understood this until I had daughters, and now I have some understanding of that fear. The thought of taking one of my daughters and walking them down the aisle and handing them to a man and trusting that he will love them and protect them and serve them and care for them and look after them, it causes me fear, grave concern.

The women have legitimate fears and what Peter is saying is that men need to be a particular way so that those fears are alleviated. And I love his words, “in an understanding way, showing honor.” That’s a man. That’s a man. Now as I say this, many of you guys will nod your head and say, “Yeah, that’s me.” No, you’re not. So let me practically unpack this for you. Every man who hears this, even the best men among us, has areas of repentance and growth that are required. And so I want to talk to you men about some things that your woman will fear.

1. Honor your wife maritally.

What this means is, gentlemen, you’re not looking for a girlfriend if you are single. You’re not looking for a roommate. You’re not looking for a cohabitation partner. You’re looking for a wife. You’re looking for a wife. If he can’t even honor you while dating, that is when he is on his best behavior. I don’t care if he apologizes, does he repent and lead? Being sorry is not enough; being Christ-like is what is necessary. Ephesians 5:25, “Husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Is he selfless or selfish? Does he give himself up for you or does he take from you?

When you get married, men, you are to be a one-woman man. That’s the requirement of an elder and that is the example for all men.

You’re not the flirt guy.
You’re not the female buddies guy.
You’re not the download porn guy.
You’re not the “I got another gal on the side I always keep in case of emergency” guy.
You’re not the wandering eye guy.

If you are, you’re not honoring marriage and you’re not honoring your wife. I know some complete fools, they like to take their wedding ring off when they go out to the sports bar with the boys. Do you honor your marriage covenant? Do you take responsibility as the head of the marriage covenant, take responsibility for the well- being of the woman?

See, a woman has great fear. If you don’t honor marriage, she is statistically going to go into poverty upon divorce. She will become yet another single mother. She’ll have to find a way to explain to the children of why they shouldn’t be embittered against you even though you’re a loser. See, these fears are very legitimate. See the women have seen this so many times that they’re fearful of men.

2. Honor her physically.

Peter says that the woman is the “weaker vessel.” What that means is that generally speaking, if a husband and a wife get in a fistfight, he’ll win. I’ll give you an example. Many of you have seen my wife, Grace. If we get in a fight, it’s not a fair fight. I have an 18-inch neck, she has an 18-inch waist. If someone breaks into our home, I’m not “Go get ‘em, baby. You’re the tough one here. I’ll pray. I’ll pray. I’ll pray. I’ll prayimprecatory prayers in the closet.”

You know what, gentlemen? You are stronger than your woman.

Do you ever hit her?
Do you ever shove her?
Do you ever push her?
Do you ever grab her, restrain her?
Do you ever raise a hand and threaten her?
Do you ever intimidate her with physical violence?
Do you give her that look, that pierced, glazed, violent, angry, don’t-push-it-now’s-a-good-time-to-shut-up look?
Do you tell her, “I’m getting very angry, you should just shut up right now. It’s gonna go bad for you”?
Do you get right in her face?
Do you intimidate her with your presence?

Shame on you. A man who picks on a woman, what a joke. What a joke.

Have you ever forced yourself on a woman? You’re a rapist. You’ll say, “She’s my wife.” You’re a rapist.

You know, when someone is attacked, we call it abuse. As horrible as that is, what is even worse is torment. Torment is when you’re abused and you can’t get out. This is like prisoners of war and those who are held captive in slavery. For some women, their version of slavery and captivity and torment is called marriage. Their husband is physically intimidating. She’s afraid of him. She can’t leave, at least that’s what she thinks. She feels stuck, particularly if she’s got children. Some of you guys are tormentors and abusers and rapists and husbands and Christians, and that is absolutely inexcusable.

Most men don’t walk around thinking about their personal safety. I know a lot of women who do. Does she feel safe with you? Ladies, if you’re dating a guy who has ever been physically violent, run for your life, run for your children’s life, run for your grandchildren’s life. If he’s ever even threatened you with violence, there is something profoundly demonic in that man. There is something sincerely wrong in that man. He will then apologize, tell you he is sorry. He will shed a few tears, say it will never happen again and he will subtly shift the blame to you. “You know when you do that, it just makes me really angry. Don’t do that again.” “Oh, okay, it must be my fault.” It’s never your fault. It doesn’t matter what you say or do, if a man hits you, harms you, he’s in sin, no excuse.

And there are some guys, some absolute block-headed idiots who think when the Bible says that you’re the head of the home, that it means you get to be the bully. There’s nothing uglier than a guy who then takes this same disposition toward his children, especially his daughters. The grossest, vilest thing is a man who hits a woman, and the man who hits a woman is willing to hit his own daughter. It’s disgusting.

3. Honor your wife emotionally.

Some of you say, “I’m not emotional, I don’t connect.” You should. Men and women have the same emotions; they express them in masculine and feminine ways.Your wife needs intimacy. She wants you to know her. She wants to know you. She wants you to open up. She wants you to be passionate and loving and honest, and she wants to know you and she wants to be known by you. And the Bible says that Adam was with his wife, Eve, and he, what? He knew her. He knew her.

There are too many guys that turn marriage into a job description. He does his responsibility, she does hers, and there’s no emotional connection whatsoever. And see, those are guys whose sins are sins of omission. “I didn’t hit her, I didn’t yell at her.” Yeah, but you didn’t love her. You didn’t connect with her. You didn’t encourage her. You didn’t pursue her. So ultimately, you failed her.

4. Honor her verbally.

How do you speak to her? Do you have nasty nicknames for her? Do you raise your voice? Do you threaten her? Do you give back-handed comments? Some of you guys would say, “I would never hit a woman.” How about with your tongue? How about with your tongue? Not just speaking to your wife, but about her. Not just speaking to her in her presence, but speaking about her in her absence. When you wife is not there and you’re with the boys, how do you speak of her? What do you say about her? You know what? Your children will pick this up as well. You start saying horrible things about your wife, and the children will be left in this horrible position of choosing between their mother and father and invariably some of the children will despise their own mother and speak evil of her in an effort to remain loyal to their father. See a division in a marriage includes the children, they’re stuck in the middle. They’re casualties of the war.

You men could defuse this and take away this fear by honoring her verbally. Speaking honestly, respectfully, lovingly to her and about her. See, some of you guys, you forget. You say, “Well, Jesus isn’t there. My wife isn’t there. I get to say whatever I want.” No, Jesus is there even when your wife’s not there. God, see God hears everything. God sees everything. God knows everything, and you’re not getting away with anything.

5. Honor your wife financially.

“If a man does not provide for the needs of his family, he’s denied the faith and worse than an unbeliever.” There’s a verse. See, the woman’s curse was her children and submitting to her husband. The man’s curse was providing for his family. And what the weakest, most impish, worthless men among us do is “Oh, my load is heavy. I know yours is heavy, but I need you to carry half of mine too.” Men, you gotta work. You gotta work hard. You’ve gotta out-work the other men if you want to feed your family.That’s your responsibility as a man. If you want any men to respect you, if you want your wife to respect you, if you want your children to respect you, you pay the bills. You make the money, you feed the family.

We live in this day where there are guys telling their wives, “Hey, birth control, abortion,” “We can’t have kids,” “You make too much money,” “I don’t like responsibility.” Shame on you. There’s nothing sadder than a woman who loves Jesus and wants to be a mom, and the husband keeps saying, “I’m the head of the home, no.” What he’s saying is “I’m in charge and I command you to sin,” to deny all of your maternal instincts. Titus 2, “The woman should be homeward in her orientation.”

“We’re a culture that is working hard to protect women and children, and no one has the common sense to beat on the guys who are the cause of so much of the pain.”

And I know that some of you guys are gonna hear this. You’re gonna say, “Oh, but this is outdated.” Yes, and I would say look at the condition of marriages and families in our culture and ask if it’s working. The latest statistics, 40 percent of all children are born out of wedlock. It is now at the point where women aren’t even pretending they’re gonna ever get married. They go to college, get a good job, get pregnant, have a kid. They’ve lost any hope of ever finding a guy who can actually carry the load, and that’s tragic. We’re a culture that is working hard to protect women and children, and no one has the common sense to beat on the guys who are the cause of so much of the pain.

I know guys as well, they’re not generous. I know one guy, he’s such an idiot. This guy makes decent money and he’s totally chintzy with his wife. She gets no spending money, can’t go out to coffee with the girls ‘cause he’s a total control freak and tightwad. Be honoring of your wife financially, and I’m not saying you’re gonna live at this lavish and high level. But what I am saying is this: you live within your means, you make a budget, you tithe, spend, save, invest well. And I know it’s hard to live on one income. I know it’s hard. I know it’s particularly difficult in this economic climate, but for some of you boys, it’s a built-in excuse to be irresponsible.

Statistically as well, if you have children, and put them in day care so mom can work, the other costs that are associated, eating out, take-out, dry cleaning, car, second phone, cell phone, things of that nature, plus the increased tax breaks and costs and burdens… The truth is very rarely does a wife go out and get a job and contribute anything to the bottom line of the family. The taxes alone eat a huge portion of it.MSNBC did a big study on this years ago and they brought the data to the mothers who dropped their kids off at the day care. “You’re providing nothing to the income of the family,” and the women are bawling, having a nervous breakdown on television, saying, “Well, then why am I even going to work?” Good question, because that guy doesn’t even know how to run numbers on taxes. He’s not smart enough to find somebody to figure it out for him. He just says, “Put the kids in day care, get a job, shoulder half of my curse. Oh and by the way, I forgot to run the numbers, come to find it’s not really helping.” Honor her financially.

6. Honor her practically.

Some guys, the house is a wreck. It’s never finished. The furniture’s broken. The car hardly starts. They live far away from community. They don’t have a schedule. They don’t have a budget. They don’t have a plan. She doesn’t know what’s going on. The practical stuff of life, the guy’s just a zoo, just an absolute, disorganized, unplanned, throw-it-together-at-the-last-minute, hope-that-it- works nightmare. Honor her practically. Do you have a budget? Do you have a schedule? Do you have an integrated plan? Do you have a life?

7. Honor her parentally.

Gentlemen, your wife wants you to love the kids. She wants you to help raise them. She wants you to love them, to pursue them. She wants you to get guy time with the boys. She wants you to get daddy dates with the girls. She wants you to do Ephesians 6 and be their pastor. She wants you to read the Bible with ‘em. She wants you to pray with ‘em. And you know what? You should too.

So many guys who are even Christians think “I pay for Christian school, I send the wife and kids to the Christian church. I’ve done my Christian duty.” No, you’ve abdicated your responsibility to others. It’s your job to love your kids. It’s your job to pray with your kids. It’s your job to teach the Bible to your kids. It’s your job to encourage your kids. It’s your job to discipline your kids.

“Christian, husband, father, employee. Those are your first four duties; it’ll take most of your life. You’re not gonna have a lot of time.”

A wife will be so forgiving of so many things if she actually knows that her husband desperately loves their children, that he serves them, that he cares for them, that he’s tender with them, that he’s Pastor Dad for them. So few children actually have a father. So few of those actually have a Christian father and how few of those actually have a dad who’s doing his job.

And I’ll tell you what, guys, this is not something you have to do; it’s something you get to do. This is wonderful. I mean every night, my daughter Alexie, blond hair, blue eyes, looks like Tinkerbell, “Poppa Daddy, I need a piggyback ride and a Bible story.” You know what? I do too. I need that as much as Alexie. I weep thinking of the day that I’m not gonna be giving her piggyback rides, so I give her as many piggyback rides as I can ‘cause it’s a great season and a wonderful opportunity.

What this means, gentlemen, is your priorities will be Christian, husband, father, employee. Those are your first four duties; it’ll take most of your life. You’re not gonna have a lot of time. Probably gonna need to put down your tools, your hobbies, your car, your projects, your golf clubs, your Xbox and probably going to need to put down the remote control and your laptop and your iPod to honor your wife parentally. You’re not gonna have a lot of time for a lot of other things. And gentlemen, your goal is not to stand before God and tell him what level you got to on “World of Warcraft.”

8. Honor her spiritually.

And all of this comes down to this point. There are between 11 and 13 million more Christian women than men. Many women go to church on their own. They have to drag their husband to church, they drag their children to church. It is your job, men, to lead spiritually. You pray with the family. You read the Bible with the family. You pick a good church, become a member of it, submit to it. You pick the community group or midweek class you will be in. You are the one to lead the family spiritually.

Some guys say, “Well, I don’t know what to do.” Just start by praying with your wife.There are women who will hear this sermon and deep down in their heart, this is what they want the most, “If my husband would just pray with me.” There are some of you guys, you pray with all kinds of people, you don’t pray with your wife. Do you pray with your wife? Do you pray with your kids? Do you read the Bible with your wife? Do you talk about Jesus with your wife? Do you talk about Jesus with your kids? Leading spiritually is the foundation of everything else.